This is an email, I originally wrote and never sent nearly 6 years ago. Its interesting/funny to go back and see what has stayed the same and what has changed in my life.

eastward ho!, a bowl of chili and the end of a dynasty

Hey hey everybody!!! Well here we are again, the end of a, once new year, the out set of yet another, the next step in the finite puzzle that comes together to form the existance that is ours. Where have we come from? Where are we going? Questions that we all must delve into. Another Christmas, a season of Joy, reflection and looking to the year that stands emminent on our doorstep. Any attempt to ignore it proves to be futile. We must look to the new year, we must look to change. What have we done? Where has it gotten us? Is there a margin of error? Or room for improvement? Will we sit and hope that our current direction will hold true for yet another year? Or will we change that path in hopes of making the world a "better place." Will our failures help us grow or leave us floundering? New years resolutions, everyone has them, and everyone breaks them. Will you stick to yours? Can I stick to mine? Will this year be the year that things change? Just as we ask every year. Can we change ourselves in order to change the world? Leo Tolstoy once said "Everyone thinks of changing society but no one thinks of changing themself." Lets go or fail trying, with the pride of having at least tried.

This past year has been a year of growth and change for me. Just over a year ago I was returning home from Romania, most of you were kind enough to come along with me in prayer and support. Coming back and facing the changes and inner-conflicts that this trip taught me about the life we live, desiring to know Jesus heart for the poor and our role in that. Since then, I have had three jobs, Midwest Express Airlines(baggage handler) Marriot Hotel Reservations(ummm...telephone hotel reservations agent) and China Buffet(server) and learned the 'joys' of working a 70 hour work week and functioning on -literally, little to no sleep at all. I had the opportunity to return to Romania with a youth team from my church. I have attended the University of Nebraska at Omaha for a semester, often at the cost of my sanity as term papers went un-typed up till the night before they were due. All of that, barring the millions of boring details, brings us to now and onward.

Well, In the next few days I am moving out(lets change that to 'a few days ago'), to a house with a bunch of guys from church, down at 38th and Farnam. I am taking a semester off of school in order to work and save up for this coming fall, in which I hope to attend the University of Nebraska at Lincoln(GO BIG RED-proud and un-abashed after this past season.) I will be turning my program of study from broadcasting to Film Studies at UNL. What this will ultimately do for me, I do not know. But one desire of mine is to direct films, when I grow up. This summer I hope to be in the city of Minneapolis. Helping out on the movie set of this SUPER cool guy that I know. With all that, again barring all of the details about this next year that I dont know yet, brings us to this point next year. I will probably be sitting at this same spot in my house typing an email similar to this one.
Will this next year drop us off in the same place we picked up, unsatisfied with a bad taste in our mouth? Will we come to this place: 2003 still holding the same frustrations? Will we sit and watch as the world slowly drifts by or can we get up and make a difference? Can we change ourselves in order to change the world? It only takes a spark to start a forest fire, why is it that the spark is the hardest to produce? As we step into the new year lets light that spark and allow that to be our catalyst.

I guess that optimally I would close all of this out with a big stunning presentation of THE one thing that I think we should all strive for. Unfortunatly I dont have a universal propoganda of this magnitude at this time. I would contend however that all of us can think of at least one thing that they would like to change in their own life, and we can think of a number of things that we would like to change about society. Lenin once said, "Without a revolutionary theory there can be no revolutionary movement." This would be to say that there is always a beggining to any revolution. Why do you think that there is a marked 'historical site' at all of the major revolutionary 'birth places'? Because this is where the masses gathered, this is the place where the peoples conscious was stirred, this is where emotion was aroused, and something changed. Kingdoms have had their rise and fall on revolutions. Regimes have seen their power come and go. Whats the hardest part of accomplishing any task? Where to start, right? It usually takes something to motivate us to 'get off the couch and do something.' Perhaps, this could be the start we are looking for, Perhaps we can all work together to push and encourage everyone. Perhaps we can change the world. Lets Go.

"everyman dies, but not everyman really live."
-William Wallace, Braveheart

"...I dont want to lose heart, I want to believe."
-Robert the Bruce, Braveheart



peace,

matt

my new contact information is as follows,

3819 Farnam st
Omaha, NE. 68131

phone number,

(402)933-8973

email,

thetick91@yahoo.com

please, call or drop by anytime, I would love to hang out and show you around.

I am blessed with the most amazing friends and family in the world. Thank you for being in my life and allowing me to be in yours.

On my way to work this a couple days ago, biking through the falling snow I saw a guy with mohawk, full, and probably 10" tall. I was sort of jealous.

On my way to lunch, I was approached individually by two different Green Peace'rs; "Would you like to help save the whales?" I wanted to, I really did. Part of me is pressed by the fact that I have loans to pay off. Part of me is pressed by the other guy I saw down the street, hunkered down next to a building, shivering, cold, with a sign next to him that said; "Broke and Alone. Please help" in hand scrawled, permanent ink on corrugated cardboard box that was beggining to deteriorate as the snow around it melted. I thought to myself; that guy might be more honest with his humanity than most people I know. Who isn't Broke and Alone? Was he talking about being broke financially or just as a human, broken?

Part of me is concerned for the whales. Ok, truth be told, a big part of me is concerned for the whales. I feel that if we don't begin to take preventative measures now, then what is affecting the whales and polar bears today will be effecting humans, us, tommorow.

Part of me realizes that what is affecting the polar bears is already affecting humans. People are dying at an alarming rate and we are for the most part, not alarmed.

People often ask me why I bike (particularly when its 10 degrees out and snowing.) I'am often unable to articulate a sensible reason, but as I've thought about it, Ive been able to formulate a decent idea as to why I bike.

Its good for me - I find biking to be therapeutic, it relaxes me, yes, even while biking between cars in downtown Chicago (yes, while wearing a helmet, mom.) Not to mention the health benefits.

Its good for the environment - I produce very few green house gasses while biking. =) I also find that it helps connect me to my surroundings. Biking in it, as opposed to through it, behind the windshield of a car.

Its good for the economy - It saves me quite a bit of money which I am then able to pass on to others who may need it more. Also, not supporting "Big Oil" feels pretty good.

This past year has been pretty momentous in many aspects. I guess the biggest was graduation. I associated it alot with a feeling of being new born, pushed out into the world, slapped on the back and forced to breath. I associate alot with how an infant might feel taking their first few shaky steps. Or a baby bird, pushed from the nest for the first time. One mis-step and you're on the ground, lessons learned, ready to try again.

Learning to live in Chicago has been an adventure. "Does this EL train really go to where I need to go?", "Is Adams st 100N or 100S?", and "Where is the closest Jimmy John's for yet another sub lunch?" I feel that I've grown alot, which will probably only be marked by looking back five years from now and seeing how much more I have grown, again. The older I get, the more I realize I don't know or understand.

I am currently working two-jobs (60+ hours a week) at Starbucks and Corgi USA (www.corgi-usa.com) I am an Administrative Assistant (receptionist) for a company that sells die-cast collectors models, and a barista at the largest coffee retailer in the world. Wooo! I got my degree for this. I got my degree for this?! More to the point, I got the loans I am currently paying off in order to get my degree. (Crap!!)

The future, 2008, I see flying cars and teleports. But for myself I see, I dunno. The plan was to move to Houston with some great friends, to live simply in community and to love more. In brief; to use less and to love more. In essence thats my plan for 2008. Houston has sort of fallen through for the moment, but I am not counting it out. Where I'll end up location wise is entirely up in the air, I will most likely be in Chicago through July when my lease is up.

My resolutions for the upcoming year are:

To read The Lord of the Rings trilogy.
To read the New Testament (as most of what Jesus said is in there.)
To finish a feature length screenplay (one of any of the few that I am working on)
To live slower, smaller, simple and to use what I've been given to hopefully help others live more fulfilled lives.

I wish you all an fantastic 2008, I wish that I could spend more time with each of you, and if anyone would like to move anywhere and live together with people for the mutual good then do it!

"To infinity and Beyond!"
-Buzz Lightyear, Toy Story

peace,

matt